Everyone is vulnerable to failure, professionally, academically, or even emotionally, but the way to deal with failure differs from one person to another. There are two types of people depending on the way they approach their failed experiences:
The first type
Failures are not well handled and dealt with in unhealthy ways that result in greater failures and more disappointments. Some of the unhealthy patterns of dealing with failure include:
- Denial, failure to acknowledge failure, and insistence on error: This usually stems from arrogance over admitting it. Failure grows and worsens and spawns more foci of corruption and wrinkles, and it is inherited in the arrogant soul.
- Surrender and loss of morale: With the first blow of the wind of failure the fire of enthusiasm is extinguished, and the soul sinks into the darkness of the creek and frustration.
- Excessive sensitivity to failure and self-flagellation with the whip of regret and heartbreak: This pattern is common for people who suffer from a perfectionist obsession, as they consider failure a devastating earthquake that they cannot bear, and when they are exposed to a failed experience, their self-confidence is shaken, their will is broken, and they are overwhelmed by the tsunami of anxiety and depression.
The second type
He deals with failure in a healthy way, recognizing his failures and getting out of them with the least harm, and even turning them in his favor, drawing on their lessons and learning from their lessons and lessons. Here are nine tips for dealing with failure successfully:
- Give yourself the right to fail
No human can claim to have failed at something in their life, and you are no exception. Let go of the obsession with perfection, you are not and will not be perfect. Even the most successful people do not deny that they have failed, but rather that they have failed more than others because only those who dare to fail powerfully can succeed powerfully. Rather, failure to fail is a negative indicator of lack of experience, negativity, and sluggishness within the comfort zone.
2. Admit failure when it occurs
This calls for being honest with yourself and admitting your failure. Do not hang your failure on others’ hankering or makeup excuses because you will find a lot of them. Be honest because “integrity is the first chapter in the Book of Wisdom.” You will not learn from your mistakes unless you admit them.
3. Allow yourself to grieve when you feel the loss
Certainly, there is something worthy of grief when you fail, for the hopes that you have built have collapsed, and the effort, money, and time that you have expended have gone unheeded, so let the rivers of sadness flow inside you and do not build their paths dams so that your feelings will accumulate and your soul is drowning in fetid feelings. Out of your weakness, summon your family or friends whom you trust and tell them that sadness fills your chest and that pain squeezes your heart, and if you find of them a nurturing shoulder or a warm embrace, do not hesitate to lie down with him and cry! Thus the rivers of sadness will recede quickly from the banks of your heart, and the sun will rise on the fertile steppe and fill with flowers again.
4.Take advantage of anger
It is easy to generate anger and discontent and increase when you feel a failure, do not let it explode inside you and smash your confidence and suffocate you with negative feelings, but let it blow you into the flames of challenge and make it a turbine that pushes you up, and take from its roots a fire that burns the weeds that have grown inside you and blocked the sun of success from your seeds. Point his ax at your bad habits to root them out.
5. Remind yourself of your successes
When we fail part of our lives, we tend to remember other failed experiences, and we forget all our successes and accomplishments, so the spiral of thoughts begins to pull our spirits down and finally collide with the bottoms of depression. To break this vicious circle of misery, you must recall your successes and your accomplishments. When you feel frustrated, for example, write a list of your traits and accomplishments that you cherish. This will remind you that if you fail with a project, it does not mean that you are a failed person.
6. See failure as an enriching experience
On the bright side of the equation; The amount of lessons we learn from failure is greater and more stable than the lessons that success teaches us, so it is said that success is a failed teacher and failure is a successful teacher! When you fail, you know your strengths and weaknesses, and you know the truth about those around you, and most importantly, you know yourself better. Sometimes by losing a battle you learn what makes you win a war. Remember that the child falls dozens of times before he walks, but every bump you stumble upon brings him closer to his first step, and if you are no longer a child, you are only an extension of time for that child.
Therefore, when you go through a failed experiment, do not bury it in the cemetery of oblivion before explaining the reasons for its failure and developing vaccines that give you more immunity that fortifies you in your next experiments. Find the causes and roots of the problem. Ask yourself the following questions:
What are the reasons that led to this failure?
What are the negative traits that generate these causes?
What are the psychological roots that generated these negative traits?
You will discover a series of connected and interwoven errors. Deconstruct them and address them, this is how you will be able to find weaknesses and turn them into elements of strength. Failure will become a tool for self-improvement.
7. Make a strong new start
Winston Churchill defines success as moving from one failure to another without losing your resolve. Life did not end with that failure. Rather, it just started with a purer beginning after you got rid of your weaknesses and stuffed your bag with lessons. You will be more challenging, determined to succeed, and more knowledgeable about yourself.
8. Mix up with successful people
They are full of experiences and experiences, learn from them how to handle their problems and how to deal with them. With their failures. Also, successful people know that failure is inevitable, so they do not judge you when you fail, but rather extend a helping hand and inspire you with successful solutions.
9. Stay away from negative people
They discourage you and increase your sense of loss. Therefore, it is best to avoid them because they have a toxic effect on both the soul and the body.